challenges

Challenges look like a monster at the time, and when you walk out of it, it is actually a pretty creature. Why...how.... yeah yeah, before dropping your jaw out, it is challenges that makes you. Who are you? If anyone can start to truthfully answer that, i think you have already reached a point great understanding. Since still facing challenges which is shaping me, wouldnt say that i have reached that point life. One day!

Tears, sleepless nights, endless sessions with your mates to whine about situations, and not forgetting, times of self-questions, (why am i here? what am i doing?) will one day reach the end. There is always a firm ground at the bottom...just do not underestimate the depth. The process of reaching the the bottom is challenging, however, once reached there, you know, the best is to come! IT is at this time, the virtue of patience being seen. Patience to wait for things to happen, and for people to act. In a tug-of-war between patience and challenge, it is us who will benefit. When challenges are confronted with patience, a new baby is born--character!

reality hits

love for you as i always have
in life, never get what i ever wanted
hence, appreciate all that i ever been granted

more special in life, i never feel
broken dreams u have all healed
complaints abt u would feel
its just expression of myself of a daily meal

young age as i am
dreams and fantasy i still have


on the ground, my feet is planted
no ending i can see, little hope i still hope to be rendred

pain and sorry all i passed
lasting happiness i like to ask
if away from u, all that i must
a new life to begin, i will start

Eulogy

A piece of art may cost 800, but after the artist died, the value of the piece of art will be 1400. This is not new to us. Surely at some point in your life, you heard about stories like that. Have you ever heard how others speak of a deceased. 98% of the time, its all about, "he's such a filial son", "she's the best student in school". Suddenly, when someone dies, all the quality of that person will be known. Little did we know that, while the person is living, what she has done, what did he went through.

I am wondering, how my eulogy would be? Can you imagine sitting at your own funeral, listening to all your close ones speaking about you-your qualities!! I would imagine, if there is any for me, it would be, "Jeannie was a cheerful and friendly girl. She loves adventure bla bla bla.." I hope (not sure how is this going to be executed) my eulogy would be different, as I feel nobody really knows me, that include myself. Why start listing all the positive qualities about me. It is all just going to make people cry. am i really all that?

I will want to write my own eulogy... hope when that day comes, somebody will find it. Whats new?? Am I not already known for doing all the different things in life?

Doing the opposite

As common saying goes, life is a circle. What goes round comes around. About a year ago, troubled with the peer-pressure to do something for Christmas and New Year. Surprisingly, here i am again!! Why is one so excited about the festive? Because its holiday season, or because everyone is doing something?

As the year coming to an end, time for reflection and resolution. Well, looking back to the year, there were times where i reach the cloud, and there were times where its so deep down where ray of sun can be glaring. Despite of all, life lessons learnt are treasured. For every moment passed, they will not be returned.

Self-development, self improvement become hot topics of discussion. When a child, people speak about the kind of sports they are good at, the type of school to attend so that they can get the utmost attention from the teachers. Older, improving themselves with foreign languages which sounds more like aliens..are few examples of what people would do to improve themselves. But, what is the ultimate goals to all these? Gathering knowledge?! How much and what do we do with them?

Ever thought of whatever we seek for can not be found. For example, someone who is after weatlth, would find themselves not rich enough or someone who seeks for love, would always feel unloved. Wondering, if someone whose interest in learning, when is he going to be intelligent enough to stop doing it? So, in the end, we end up being where we started.

Vanity Vanity Vanity

Prague > First day, first impression

Prague, a city which everyone adores or at least will have recommendation for. My first encounter with this city was some years back while I was in the university. Easy jet flies to Prague and some of the students would just go there to have parties. When they come back, they would not stop talking about the vibrant city.

Cultured, beautiful, romantic, lovely, all description often heard for this place. Here I am now. The first impression I have here is that people over exaggerated about how extraordinary this place is. No deny that this is a lovely place with nice old buildings, but these kinds are everywhere in Europe!! Just like any other developed countries, they are proud of their own language, hence other international language like French or English, almost in no existent. However, there is always exception to everything, Pubs!!! British Pubs or drinking places…they are clearly marked that no visitors would miss.

Smiles cost the same as diamonds in some countries. If you ever stumble on one, do not let it pass by, make sure you get the person’s name and contact details. It certainly would be a great treasure to find. A friend of mine, who is crazy about the central Europe, once said, ‘If you ever want to fall in love, go to Prague’ The place is so romantic. It makes me wonder how it would be possible to fall in love with walking human who hardly smiles. Perhaps, from where I came from, warm greetings and big smiles are just too easily accessible.

Public transport here would be the most efficient thing in the city. It makes the distance to everywhere in Prague to be reachable in less than 15 minutes. Despite of this convenience, the locals would not be seen out on the street often. “family oriented’ as they are known, would be rushing home whenever possible. This same kind of efficient transportation also seen in Hong Kong but that has an opposite effect, where it would be more than common for people to hang out on the streets, shopping malls instead of staying home.



Disclaimer: Entering into my 12th month stay in this city, views have changed.

who needs sleep?

Who Needs Sleep?

Words & Music by Steven Page & Ed Robertson

Now I lay me down not to sleep
I just get tangled in the sheets
I swim in sweat three inches deep
I just lay back and claim defeat

Chapter read and lesson learned
I turned the lights off while she burned
So while she's three hundred degrees
I throw the sheets off and I freeze

Lids down, I count sheep
I count heartbeats
The only thing that counts is
that I won't sleep
I countdown, I look around

Who needs sleep?
(well you're never gonna get it)
Who needs sleep?
(tell me what's that for)
Who needs sleep?
(be happy with what you're getting
There's a guy who's been awake
since the Second World War)

My hands are locked up tight in fists
My mind is racing filled with lists
of things to do and things I've done
Another sleepless night's begun

Lids down, I count sheep
I count heartbeats
The only thing that counts is
that I won't sleep
I countdown, I look around

Who needs sleep?
(well you're never gonna get it)
Who needs sleep?
(tell me what's that for)
Who needs sleep?
(be happy with what you're getting
There's a guy who's been awake
since the Second World War)

Who needs sleep?
(well you're never gonna get it)
Who needs sleep?
(tell me what's that for)
Who needs sleep?
(be happy with what you're getting
There's a guy who's been awake
since the Second World War)

There's so much joy in life,
so many pleasures all around
But the pleasure of insomnia
is one I've never found
With all life has to offer,
There's so much to be enjoyed
But the pleasures of insomnia
are ones I can't avoid

Lids down, I count sheep
I count heartbeats
The only thing that counts is
that I won't sleep
I countdown, I look around

Hala Hala Hala...

Who needs sleep?
(well you're never gonna get it)
Who needs sleep?
(tell me what's that for)
Who needs sleep?
(be happy with what you're getting
There's a guy who's been awake
since the Second World War)

Next chapter

Two days ago, I touched down at Prague airport again, and it marks the next chapter of life adventure. About 11 months ago, here I was for the very first time in my life, with teary eyes and full of regrets. Observing the full moon in the cold wintry night, and remembering some words from a close friend, "you have a history ahead of you, write the ending for it with your life"

Along with those words, I've soon lost myself in this city of madness. Fortunately, to be found again with new wonders, who marked not only a chapter of my life but also who had added fragrance to my soul.

Some of you who might already know me well enough, is aware that, that life issues are no stranger to me. Towards the end of 20s, the common question that everyone would ask or consider about is, marriage. Tying the knot with someone we think we are in love with so that we can spend more time together and more official moments together. At some point, it has become the passport to have children for me. A family, is known to be the basic instituition for childre to grow in. However as time comes closer, am beginign to question, if it is really true. Why would a family be important for a child's growth. How about, having children without a family? Who would provide support to you and your offspring during the low days?
Would it be sufficient for one partner to shower all loves and care to a child?